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The god Pan, Arcadian Lord of the flocks and pastures, answers your questions about computers and the Internet.
This topic has been raised on more than one email circular before now.
The case for feminine gender:
The case for masculine gender:
In case the answer isn't clear from the guidelines above, here is a much easier method of determining gender. Whatever gender you are, your computer is the opposite.
You're labouring under some serious misapprehension there if you think those numbers relate to years. They tell you the percentage of computer resources required to run the Windows operating system. As you can see, things were getting pretty tight by the time they were on 98, and 2000 was only suitable for networks, as you had to spread the operating system across 20 computers just to get one machine working properly.
The company escaped the naming formula with NT (Not Telling) and has recently thrown observers further off the scent with XP, which stands for Xeroderma Pigmentosum, a rare genetic skin disease characterised by hyper-sensitivity to the sun.
The next Windows operating system will be called Longhorn – another medical term, this one relating to male sexual arousal.
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Send your questions to Pan at firstname.lastname@example.org
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